Our dog, Maggie, died suddenly but not unexpectedly at our home on May 25th, 2024. This is a story of our lives together, and why losing a pet can cut so deeply in today’s world.
Continue reading “Yonder Goes Little Maggie”Yonder Goes Little Maggie
A Therapist on Satisfaction in Sport, Life, and Love
If you haven’t noticed, the concept of achievement and even competitiveness has weighed heavily on my mind as of late. A gift of the nontraditional life is the opportunity to step back and see the world around us with a degree of unusual clarity, far from the treadmill. For years I valued athletic and professional progress in ways that weren’t making my life better, but I thought they were. I searched for and implemented solutions to the wrong problems. Meanwhile, what truly mattered—mainly my relationships—withered on the vine. The journey toward rectifying these tendencies continues today.
My guest today, Lincoln Stoller, is a former mountaineer who now specializes in psycho-, hypno-, and neurofeedback therapy, in tandem with numerous other counseling and coaching services. Lincoln holds a PhD in Theoretical and Mathematical Physics from UT Austin, including a post-doc assignment at UC Berkley. Lincoln eventually moved from quantum physics to create a management and automation software platform for businesses, learned to build Norwegian log homes, traveled and lived abroad in far-flung foreign lands, and is even a certified pilot. To say Lincoln lives well outside of the bounds of normalcy is probably a half-truth at best. As he says in the interview, we should “just keep doing out-of-the-box stuff. And if people aren’t calling you a little crazy or a little nutty, then you probably aren’t exploring enough of the boundaries.”
Today’s conversation revolves around the high-risk potential of hard-charging performers and achievers, whether they exist in sports, business, or other areas of life. While these individuals hold our collective attention and admiration, Lincoln outlines how their psychological roots run shallow. They often struggle to stay satisfied with themselves or those around them. Lincoln might even say he holds an anti-hard-man philosophy. I think you’ll see why.
Continue reading “A Therapist on Satisfaction in Sport, Life, and Love”Four Years of Financial Independence: The Slow Growth
For four years I’ve watched something slowly bloom. In my old life, the “before time” you might call it, I moved from task to task. If I wasn’t working, I unknowingly made a practice of turning recreational or hobbyist pursuits into something that, from an outsider’s perspective, looked an awful lot like work. Goals and accolades were everything, and the more quantifiable, the better. But the farther I’ve separated myself from this life in space and time, the more clarity I’ve gained.
Grasping for metaphors, I was tempted to explain this budding awareness as a slowly growing flower. But for perhaps all the wrong reasons, I hesitated to describe my growth and awareness as floral, preferring to drop the metaphor. But I can’t quite shake it, because I have watched something slowly grow. It’s not me that has bloomed–again, all the wrong imagery–but it is the world I could not see then. I could not see the flawed logic buried in the cold and wet earth because I identified with it. It was my life, so I could not reject what protected me. And four years later I’ve watched something slowly take root.
Continue reading “Four Years of Financial Independence: The Slow Growth”Facing the Rest of the World with a Nontraditional Lifestyle
When I left my corporate career in early 2020, I didn’t fully understand the ways that I would, in later years, slowly become decoupled and desynchronized from a society that values hustle, status, and self-worth generated to a large degree around our career titles. You’ll read the same thing repeatedly on the internet: Ignore the haters, do your thing.
But when I actually sit down and talk with those who are living a similar nontraditional lifestyle, regardless of their financial position, I find that the tidy internet talking points leave many of us dissatisfied. After all, humans are one of the most social species on the planet. We shouldn’t be surprised by the difficulty in overriding instinct, to go against the grain of what the herd values most. My thinking has evolved dramatically on this subject in recent years, so let’s dig in.
Continue reading “Facing the Rest of the World with a Nontraditional Lifestyle”The One Time to Be Average with Dave Rosen
Dave Rosen is a climber and ophthalmologist in his final year of residency. And Dave grew up like so many of us: broadly exposed to the importance of money and taught a thing or two about saving, but investing was a foreign concept and his lack of knowledge was a source of shame.
While Dave skimmed over it, he’s no slouch as a climber. He has bagged a pile of double-digit boulder problems up to V12, sent 5.13c, and developed numerous boulder problems, particularly in the South Mountain area near Phoenix where he and his wife lived for medical school for four years. He is hard-working, analytical, and pragmatic in his career and life approach.
In this conversation, we discuss how Dave found climbing from the world of canyoneering, his early exposure to money and how that has markedly changed in recent years, the constant pull of greener grass, working backward from an ideal lifestyle, and the ethical and moral dilemmas of early retirement.
Continue reading “The One Time to Be Average with Dave Rosen”The Real Cost of Home Ownership (and a Life Update)
In the summer of 2020, we sold our home in Denver, Colorado, where we had lived for seven years. Once all the costs were tallied, we were shocked to see the return on our home ownership investment. Should we have rented instead? Today we revisit this post in light of our recent move.
Continue reading “The Real Cost of Home Ownership (and a Life Update)”Six Important Reasons to Reconsider Early Retirement
Today on episode 65 I’m revisiting a post published almost exactly two years ago. At the time of writing, I’d been away from my corporate job for eighteen months. I spent six months of that time living in a tiny A-frame camper with my wife and dog before resettling in the St. George, Utah area.
I was climbing a lot and working on this website, but I can now comfortably admit that I was in a bit of a low spot in terms of overall life satisfaction. The issue was one of expectations. In other words, I expected too much about a life without my career and I took for granted elements of my work life that enhanced life satisfaction. I was feeling stale with this project—I wouldn’t start the podcast until late summer—and despite having all the time in the world to dedicate to the craft of climbing, I was slowly coming to the realization that I’d used climbing as an attempt to fill a void that was not yet clearly defined or outlined.
Two years later, I’ve spent considerable time addressing each of the areas discussed in this post, to varying degrees of success. Stay tuned in the coming weeks and months for other changes still ongoing.
Continue reading “Six Important Reasons to Reconsider Early Retirement”Five Lessons from Three Years of Financial Independence
One evening, circa 2011, I sat over dinner with my future wife in our small and sweaty Houston, TX rented bungalow. I was and still am an occasional cheap bastard, so the air conditioning was almost certainly set to engage on an “as-needed” basis, far from anything resembling comfort. The concept of financial independence wasn’t on the radar.
During downtime at work—I told you I was distracted—I was scouring numerous free WordPress blogs documenting the travels of zealous climbing dirtbags. They were camping and climbing and making whatever money they needed along the way. People were even starting to live and travel in vans, something I associated with sixties and seventies surfer culture. I wanted that life.
At this point in my late twenties, I was maybe barely a year into my career as a geologist in the oil and gas industry. But I could see the writing on the wall—this would not and could not be my career for the next 35-40 years. In fact, at that moment, I couldn’t see myself lasting my target three to five years until I expected to return to school for a career in academia. And there was a new problem: I’d kind of grown obsessed with this new hobby of rock climbing.
Twelve years later, I finally found a very different path to a life of freedom, if such a thing even exists. After three years of financial independence, what follows are some key lessons I’ve learned along the way.
Continue reading “Five Lessons from Three Years of Financial Independence”Eudaimonia: Key Pillars of the Meaningful Life
Thinkers and philosophers of ancient times sorted out much in the way of living a meaningful and purposeful life. But after thousands of years of progress, material growth, and convenience, we largely fail to find meaning in our modern lives. Today we examine the philosophy of eudaimonia and how we can truly develop our sense of meaning and purpose (for free).
Continue reading “Eudaimonia: Key Pillars of the Meaningful Life”Seven Lessons From Two Years of Financial Freedom
It’s been almost exactly two years since I last worked for anyone else. Two years since I made a paycheck. Two years since I commuted. Two years since I waited too long, ran like a fool with a backpack smacking me in the ass, missing my bus home anyway. Two years since I rushed to the gym, exhausted after a full day of work, and grinded out a training session anyway. It’s been two years since I hurriedly traded slacks and dress shoes for chalk-covered pants and approach shoes in a cold parking garage. Two years since I told any inappropriate jokes to coworkers before a meeting began. Two years since I lived in an old house in Denver with “character” and loud, hateful neighbors. Two years since we bought a tiny A-frame camper, eventually living on the road. It’s been two years since so much changed, and today I’m here to tell you about what this sense of freedom is really all about.
Continue reading “Seven Lessons From Two Years of Financial Freedom”